Sometimes on Sundays
by Liz Hollow
Summary: It's been six years since then, and the nightmares still plague me. But sometimes on Sundays I like to go back and pretend it never happened at all.


**Sometimes on Sundays**

_I will count on you to help with this crisis… but… please… Promise you won't do anything reckless._

_I am sorry to say that we have put the greatest burden on your shoulders alone… but I trust you to take care of this._

_I'm begging, so…_

_You don't know how glad I am to see that you're still in one piece._

_I'm gonna find out what I should do to help, and then I'm going to do whatever I can. You'd better go do the same, May._

* * *

><p>The ground trembled with my every step, and my heartbeat quickened to a painful pace. But I had no choice—I couldn't turn back now, not when everyone was out there in the storm waiting for <em>me<em> to fix this: the twelve-year-old me who became a hero because I stopped Team Aqua from running away with a Devon scientist's package…

Through the haze, both from my watering eyes and the fog, I saw the basin. This must have been what Shelly wanted me to have the Aqua Suit for…

I slipped into the too-big suit, pulling it straight over my clothes and latching on the head piece last. I barely had it on before the ground shook one final time, knocking me to my knees. My heart beat so fast that I didn't know how my blood kept up with it, and I wanted to cry but knew I couldn't—everyone expected me to be brave.

Kyogre roared as it burst from the water, and a giant wave lapped against the rock. Everything about the beast made me shake in terror—its sheer size, its razor-sharp teeth, its empty gaze. The monster would have no problem chomping me in two.

"Hey! You read me, little scamp?"

On my hands and knees, I looked up at the sound of a voice in my ear. I never thought I'd be happy to hear _his_ voice, but despite all the damaged he had caused and the mess he made, it slowed my heartbeat down considerably.

"I hear you… Ar… Arch…" I whispered, unable to get his name out as tears brimmed in my eyes. I pushed myself to my feet and stood at the edge of the cave floor, just near Kyogre's back.

"Aye, it's me, Archie! There's a device built into that suit that lets me talk to you," he explained, but I didn't think I had much time for the story. Though, honestly, I wanted him to keep talking. "We're getting readings up here that look as though Kyogre's appeared. I'd guess you're staring right at it, if I'm not mistaken!"

I nodded, even knowing that Archie couldn't hear that but unable to form the words because my lip quivered too much. I bit down on it to stop it, but that movement made some tears slip down my cheeks.

Every part of this terrified me. I never showed it in front of Steven, who put way too much of his faith in me, because he expected me to be brave; I never showed it in front of Brendan, who was just as naïve as me, because he thought me capable. But here, right now with Archie's voice in my ear, I remembered that I was just a little girl—that "child" that Maxie called me before a trainer.

"A-Archie," I managed to whimper, wishing I could wipe the tears away as they trickled down my cheeks. "What do I do?"

"Don't be afraid, scamp!" his voice broke through the violent thrashing of Kyogre's waves, and I wondered if Archie was here with me seeing this, if he'd say the same thing. "You leap right onto that beastie's back! Then le—take you to—dee—est…"

I held my helmet on tighter. "Archie, you're breaking up—"

"—o—th—c…"

"Archie!" I shouted again, and then a rush of static burst within my helmet. I clutched it even more tightly, squeezing my eyes shut as I called his name again. "Archie, please! Come back!"

When the static faded out, I lowered my hands from the sides of my helmet and looked back at the raging beast in front of me. I never had a choice—there was absolutely no way I could have ever denied Steven's request to help. And yet again, the only option I had now was to do as Archie said and leap on Kyogre's back.

I ran, hoping that the pounding of my feet on the rocky cave floor beneath me might make me forget about the pounding of my heart. But it didn't. And when my feet left the ground and brought me on top of Kyogre, I grabbed onto its dorsal fins so tightly that I feared angering it more.

It dove, and I screamed as we swam through the roughest and strongest waves I ever faced. I could barely hold on—my hands were slipping from its fins, slipping, _slipping_—and it was all I could do to breathe under the pressure of all that water above me.

Even with this suit, I couldn't make it much longer.

I gasped for air as Kyogre broke to the surface, throwing me off its back and onto a new cave's floor. My tiny, frail body could barely take it—I rolled over onto my stomach with a groan and managed to stand… shakily but standing nonetheless. And when I removed the helmet, which constricted me now after going through the waves with Kyogre, I found I could only get air in desperate huffs, and nothing really satisfied me.

Everything ached, but I had to end this. That was the only option.

When Kyogre roared this time, a wave surged behind it, building taller and closer. With wide eyes, I threw a Poké Ball in front of me, one holding my Sceptile, and placed my bet for the fate of the world.

* * *

><p>I shot out of my bed like cannon fire, my scream as loud and as piercing as a siren in the bitter silence of the night.<p>

The nightmares that plagued me hadn't gone away in the six years since they started, but I still found myself startling awake in the middle of the night with sweat dripping down my forehead. I couldn't remember the last time I got a full night of sleep… Maybe when I was an innocent child, but that innocence was long gone now.

I glanced at my bedroom door, half-expecting it to burst open like it used to when I woke the house up with my screams but half-knowing that my parents ignored it now.

Wiping the sweat from my brow, I looked over at the Wailmer-alarm clock on the nightstand by my bed. Sunday, 1:46 AM. Still five hours until sunrise, which meant five hours of trying to fall back asleep until I could see the sunrays peeking in between the blinds on my window. My eyes were heavy, but not heavy enough to stay shut.

My hands shook, but I grasped the edge of my bed and pulled myself out. Leaving in the middle of the night was something else my parents ignored now, probably because their attempts to stop me in the past failed. So when I slipped out the front door, nothing stirred in the house at all. A hero could do what she wanted.

"You know where to go," I whispered as I released Latias into the sky. And then she took me soaring.

* * *

><p>Sometimes on Sundays I'd find myself back in Sootopolis glancing over my shoulder in the dead of night to make sure no one saw me entering the Cave of Origin. I hated that place. But on these Sundays, I'd sit on the ledge near the basin in which Kyogre once raged those hundreds of Sundays ago and pretend that the peaceful, quiet atmosphere was the only one that ever existed.<p>

It wasn't always like this. When I first walked out of the Cave of Origin, probably miraculously alive, I brushed it all off. Everyone out there waited for me—Steven and Brendan, and Archie, Shelly, and Maxie, too—and the sparkling sky had them staring like love-struck idiots. No one even asked me if I was okay.

They thanked me. Oh, yes, they thanked me… and who was I to reject that?

The whole time, I managed a smile. And my strength didn't just vanish overnight, even if the nightmares began almost immediately (which earned me some strange looks in the Pokémon Center where I usually slept). I could beat Wallace with a smile on my face—I could stand equal with Steven as the new Champion. Everyone used to say how happy I looked. Being Champion had been my dream for a long time, anyway.

But…

_But_. That was it, the one word that made all the difference in the world. I smiled, I laughed, I let everyone see me as the strong trainer—not child—they all thought me to be. But in those first few months being home that I awoke screaming, still no one asked what was wrong.

"Nightmares?" they asked. "You having a bad dream? Just try going back to sleep."

And I'd smile and nod and roll over in my bed so they couldn't see the tears. In the morning, they'd all forget that the little girl who saved Hoenn could be capable of fear at all.

* * *

><p>I hugged my knees against my chest and rocked back and forth. "Stop it," I muttered to myself, biting down on my knuckles to stop my teeth from chattering. The pounding of my heart echoed all the way to my ears, so the sound of my own voice didn't reach them at all. Maybe I never even said anything.<p>

_I am trusting you to do this for me!_

Groaning, I moved my hands to my ears and squeezed my eyes shut. "Shut up," I breathed. "I was only twelve."

_There is nothing to fear._

I rocked some more, my nails digging into my scalp. "Just a giant ancient Pokémon with the power to destroy the world and all who inhabited it."

_You must go regardless of what awaits you inside that cave…_

I cried out against the eerie quiet of the cave. I opened my mouth as wide as it would go and screamed as loud as I could, and the sound bounced off the cave walls and back at me a hundred times over. Those cave walls echoed back a lot of things—my desperate screams, my sobs, even my whispers. But the only thing the walls didn't shout back was the sound of the voices in my head.

No, the walls weren't so cruel. I lived with those voices every day, not just on Sundays.

* * *

><p>"Where do you go on Sundays? And when did you start drinking coffee?"<p>

I looked into the dark brown liquid in the mug in front of me—no cream, no sugar, thank you—and blinked a couple of times. When _did_ I start drinking coffee? When I couldn't take the constant exhaustion anymore?

Well, that didn't really matter. It woke me up by the third cup.

When I lifted the mug to my lips to avoid answering either question, Steven leaned his cheek against his fist with a suspicious grin. Now that he broke thirty, his features were a little sharper, but he was possibly even more attractive now than he was when we first met. And that was saying something considering the number of people telling me how hot he was back then: several enemy grunts, old women…

I couldn't disagree with that, but he was like the older brother I never had.

"May."

I set the mug down on his wooden table and smiled back at him. The smile came easily—more easily than words, which was why I tended not to say much, especially not to Steven who didn't understand where I was coming from, anyway. It wasn't that he didn't _care_. He probably did. No, he definitely did. He just didn't get it.

"I don't know, like… four or five years ago."

"That was the rhetorical question. The other one wasn't." Steven lifted his face from his hand and folded his fingers together on top of his kitchen table instead. It was moments like this that I wondered why he wasn't married with kids already—he had the stern, discipline-ready face down, and the tone, too. He'd be able to handle some tantrum-throwing tots.

_But there is a limit to what I can do with my power alone… That is why I am asking for your help._

Oh, yeah… maybe that was why.

That and his love for rocks could hardly be put aside for a partner. He barely shut up about them since his return from his training about a year ago, which made me wonder if he did any training at all.

"Your boyfriend came to see me," Steven elaborated, but this elaboration only made me a little more confused than before.

"Boyfriend?" When it clicked, I frowned down at my coffee and swirled it around in the mug. "Oh, Brendan… He's not my boyfriend."

He wished he was, though. I might've gone crazy, but I was sane enough to see that Brendan's feelings for me reached far beyond "friend" long ago. And maybe I led him on a little bit, but I couldn't date him. I didn't want to push him away—somehow, this all felt lonely enough as it was, but I couldn't ever be with him.

"I didn't mean to make an assumption, but I thought…" Steven shook his head with a slight smile. "Never mind. In any case, Brendan said that recently—in the past couple of months that you've returned home—you've been running out of town almost every weekend in the middle of the night. He wanted me to ask you where you've been going."

"Why didn't he ask me himself? Or go to my parents for that matter?" I wondered, mostly to continue avoiding the answer. I knew well enough why Brendan didn't go to my parents—_they_ had already asked _him_. They trusted him slightly more than they trusted me, which was funny, all things considered.

"He said because I'm the adult here, and you'd be more likely to tell me than him or your parents."

My head snapped up, and the pounding of my heart accelerated. No, no, no—not _now_. Please, not now.

I could barely breathe as I stood up and spun away from Steven, all so he couldn't see my face going red. "Bathroom," I managed to choke out, and I hurried quickly enough down his hallway that maybe he couldn't see my legs shaking.

With a slam of the bathroom door behind me, I collapsed on the fuzzy grey bath mat by the shower, my fingers digging into the soft fabric. I gasped for air as quietly as I could manage, hoping that Steven wouldn't be listening, and tried to calm my beating heart. That never got any easier, though, even after all this time.

When I could breathe again, I leaned back against the wall of his bathtub and ran a hand through my hair. "Fucking—" I hissed, banging my other hand against the mat with a soft _thud_.

For effect, I flushed the toilet and washed my hands, and a moment later, I exited the bathroom as if nothing happened at all. Steven was in the middle of warming up my cup of coffee with a fresh brew, and he smiled at me when I walked back into the kitchen. He always had the most reassuring smile.

"Thought you might like your coffee warmer," he explained, and then he hurried over to the coffee maker to set the pot down.

"Thanks, but…" I glanced over at the front door and ran a hand over the top of the chair where I once sat. "I think I'm going to head out."

Steven's eyebrows, as silver as the rest of his hair, rose when he turned around to face me. "Already? You're so flighty these days." He crossed his arms with a huff and a smile, so he wasn't annoyed with me specifically; that much was obvious. "And my dad calls _me_ the impatient one…"

"Well, I'm sure an adult like you has got a lot of work to do," I grumbled, all the words spilling out with a harsher tone than I meant. And once I said all of that, the rest of the thoughts in my head dripped down to my vocal chords. "You know, in case Team Magma decides to awaken the other ancient Pokémon or something. Or in case another meteoroid heads our way."

Steven's raised eyebrows furrowed together now, as though we didn't speak the same language. "What?"

It was probably better that I not dig myself even deeper into the hole I just created for myself, so I waved him off. "It's nothing. Call me again the next time you're in town—and thanks for the coffee, too."

I barely opened his front door when he called my name, and the little voice in my head told me to just get out of here before I regretted anything—before I couldn't get myself to calm down, before I couldn't flee to a bathroom. But I let my hand linger on the doorknob as I glanced back at Steven, the adult here.

"Where _do_ you go on Sundays?"

An image of Kyogre in its dwelling flashed through my head, and I squeezed his doorknob so hard that my fingers ached.

"If you really want to know," I told him, pushing the door all the way open, "ask Archie."

* * *

><p>If I thought my job as hero concluded with the capture of Kyogre, I thought wrong. It didn't end there; a giant meteoroid was heading towards our planet, sure to kill us all if it made impact. And somehow, a twelve-year-old girl like me—almost thirteen at that point, I'd admit—apparently had the authority to help deal with this.<p>

I didn't mind acting as the errand girl, and I didn't mind Zinnia picking my brain like she knew everything about me before I did. It was everything after that, specifically the revelation of Zinnia's plan, that made my heart heavy.

Zinnia's laughter in Archie's room made me linger behind the wall and hold my breath—slightly maniacal, slightly excited, but it troubled me all the same.

Archie cried out, and I covered my mouth to stop myself from saying anything. Zinnia was going around stealing Key Stones, so no doubt she was after Archie's—but she met me plenty of times and hadn't attempted to take mine.

"All right!" Zinnia's voice exclaimed. "And the winner is Zinnia!"

"Archie…" That had to be Shelly. "Are you… okay?"

Archie groaned, and I bit my lip as it quivered. "I'll be keelhauled! How did I get beat by this little slip of a girl?"

I beat him plenty of times, but… that was different. The attack wasn't unsolicited, and most of the time, it was started by Archie, not me. And honestly, Archie was the type of guy who would've ruffled my hair at the end of a battle and laughed—but Zinnia, though young, characterized herself as much more powerful than me.

Her Whismer, the one named Aster who always followed Zinnia around, chirped happily.

"Oh, oh, what's this? Aren't you a happy girl, Aster! Just what I'd expect of my daughter! We're so in sync!" Zinnia laughed, but all I could do was wonder why she referred to Aster as her daughter.

"You…" Archie again. "Who are you?"

"Who am I? That's a surprisingly difficult question." Zinnia's voice went darker and lower, and I pictured her eyes glowing with something fierce. "I couldn't become who I was supposed to be, so who does that make me now?" She laughed, then, her voice back to normal as she added, "Whatever, right? Enough with the introspection and the soul searching… You there! May! Don't just stand there like a stick in the mud. Come on over and say hi."

I winced, but I pursed my lips and turned the corner to stand just behind Zinnia. Shelly's eyes went wide, but Archie's gaze went soft—almost like my dad's when I beat him. Kind of sad but hopeful nonetheless. But Archie's concern surpassed my dad's.

"You!" Shelly pointed a slim finger in my direction.

"Scamp?" Archie shook his head only slightly, barely noticeable if I hadn't been watching him carefully. "But why are you…"

"Isn't it obvious?" Zinnia cut him off, slapping a hand hard on my back. "She's the heroine, right? Here to save the world again!" I shook her hand off me, curling my hands into fists to control my trepidations. "Oops. But looks like she's a bit too late this time. If only you'd been here just one minute earlier!"

Her words stung me so hard that I stood idle as she pranced towards Archie and forced his Key Stone off his neck. Zinnia's movements were as swift as a dragon's might be, and just as sly—the way she guided her hand over the Aqua boss's chest as she moved around him, lifting the amulet with finesse… she was a sneak.

And then for final measure, as Zinnia bounded in front of Archie again, she put her hand back on his chest and gave a swift, decisive push.

"Archie!" Shelly cried as Archie tumbled backwards. "Hang in there!"

"There now." Zinnia poked the Key Stone out of Archie's necklace and tossed the remaining gold piece on the floor in front of his feet. "I'd say this Key Stone is mine. We finally got everything, Aster.

The Whismer chirped again.

"Now we can do it…" Zinnia seemed to whisper to herself. "The summoning. We will summon Rayquaza!"

My heart must have stopped. My head rushed, the world in front of me whirring back and forth, and the sound of my own breath grew louder and louder. I put a hand on my head to try to refocus myself, but everything kept spinning—faster and faster until I couldn't tell if I was standing still or moving.

Not again… not again…

"Well then, looks like my job here is done, so don't mind me while I excuse myself. Oh. May?" Zinnia's calling of my name forced me back into full consciousness, though I couldn't help but gape at her still. "I really hope you'll come chasing after me, you know? We'll be heading to that ancient tower, sealed since primal times, the Sky Pillar. If you don't know what that is, well, ask that former Champ of yours. He'll know what I'm talking about. Find me there!"

The Whismer chirped, and then Zinnia brushed past me, her hand touching my shoulder gently as she walked to the spinning platform. My gaze lingered on her spinning form.

"Oh, man!" Shelly grumbled. "What makes her think she can just do whatever she wants and then hightail it out of here?"

I heard steps behind me—a little bit hard, so I suspected them to belong to Archie.

"Little scamp…"

I sighed and turned to face Archie. His expression had yet to change, but as his eyes flickered across my face without a word to be said, he finally grinned—perhaps a tad grimly—before shaking his head.

"Heh… Fine… I guess it's just fate. That you showed up now of all times," he offered.

Fate? _Fate_. This was no bout of fate that brought me here. This was the expectation. And after this, I'd head out to find Steven, since he apparently knew where this Sky Pillar was. This was not fate driving me.

"Shelly…" Archie held out his hand to his admin. "Give it to the girl."

Shelly's eyes went wide, and I glanced between the two. "What?" she demanded. "I-is that okay?"

Archie's grim smile pressed thinner. "Yeah…" He pressed his hands together, and I couldn't help but notice the way they shook, just like mine. "What could I do with a Mega Stone anyway, now that I've lost my Key Stone?"

The woman sighed, but she nodded. "I understand."

Her steps were much more delicate than Archie's, and she strode like a cat to me. When she held out her hand, clamped around something in her fist, I held mine out flat beneath hers. Something weighty, but not too heavy, dropped into my palm.

"The Sharpedonite," she told me as she turned to walk back towards Archie. "Make sure your Sharpedo holds onto it tightly."

Shelly barely made it to Archie's side before he took another couple of steps towards me. He reached a hand out and patted my head. "You take my power, scamp… I'm giving it to you…" he told me, his hand still pressed over my bow. "That woman… I don't think she's just any old trainer. Now with the way she controlled those Dragon-type Pokémon of hers. I got no idea what she's planning… but I think you're our best bet at stopping her now, little scamp. Do that for me."

I squeezed my eyes shut as he patted my head one last time, but that was only to stop him from seeing the tears brimming near the lids.

* * *

><p>I was too harsh towards Steven…<p>

The thing about being me—I had to keep up appearances during the day, but it was also more than just that. If I was happy in front of everyone else, then I might very well be happy after all. When I smiled, forced though it was, everyone else smiled, too. It made things… lighter.

Snapping at Steven like that… he was bound to start questioning things.

With a sigh, I pushed myself up from the ledge overlooking Kyogre's dwelling in the Cave of Origin. I'd been thinking about what I said to Steven all week, but it all felt like a slap in the face sitting here on this balmy Sunday morning. This cave did strange things, played weird games, made me think too hard.

I'd have to apologize to him. No longer was I the twelve-year-old girl who could get away with speaking rudely.

Walking out of the cave was like walking through a dream. With every step I took, I remembered the tremors Kyogre caused and very well thought it happening again. And the haze was the same still, making everything eerie and damp. It almost made me think that none of this could be real because I couldn't tell the difference between what was truly here and what happened before.

But I relished in the glow of the sun as I exited the Cave of Origin. The way it hurt my eyes, the way I had to squint with a hand over my brow—it all reminded me that I never had to deal with Kyogre again.

"Hey, there, little scamp."

I tripped over the root of the large tree just outside of the cave and found myself on my hands and knees, both aching and possibly bleeding. I groaned and leaned back to sit on my knees, staring at the rough skin ripped on my hands.

I almost forgot… I lifted my head. "Archie."

The Team Aqua boss squatted down in front of me and held his chin so his beard—speckled with silver hairs, I noticed—poked out between his index finger and his thumb. His proximity to me didn't bother me in the slightest, not like it would if it were Brendan or Steven. He seldom made me uncomfortable.

"But not so little anymore, are you?" Archie stood back up, so despite what he said, I felt small compared to him. Small, weak. Not much of a difference these days.

I crossed my arms when Archie held out a tanned hand to me, but he shrugged it off in a swift retraction. "Stop calling me 'scamp,'" I snapped, though it actually made me the tiniest bit happy when he did, after all this time, too. I knew he would keep calling me that even if I told him not to, which was half the reason I did.

As tears began to well in my eyes again, I shifted onto my bottom and pulled my knees into my chest, if only to bury my face against them.

In spite of all of the trouble Archie caused for me—none of this would have ever happened if it wasn't for him—I liked him, and I sort of had the feeling that he liked me, too. He was drastically different than my own father, but in a way, he sort of reminded me of my old man. It was dumb, certainly, and possibly inexplicable.

Team Aqua was always one big happy family, albeit messed up and severely dysfunctional. They were all so close. And somehow I thought he let me into it all.

Stupid. Stupid, stupid.

"What are you doing here?" My voice sounded muffled against my knees, and I spoke so loudly that I shivered from the vibrations.

"Well, you best be telling me. A friend of yours told me I'd know where to find you, squirt." There was a pause as I lifted my head, but though I expected a somewhat serious expression from Archie, he burst out laughing with his mouth wide open. "I kind of like that. 'Squirt.' I guess you ain't small enough for that, though… Scout? Eh, no. Aye, well, I'll think of something for ya."

"What friend?"

Archie smiled, and when he held a hand out to me one more time, I let him pull me to my feet. I couldn't look him in the eye right now, even when I saw him turn away out of my peripherals. I stared instead back towards the enormous doors to the Cave of Origin. It was bright out now—much too late for me to flee back inside.

"The silver-haired pretty boy," Archie finally responded, and I took a step closer to the doors in front of me. "He went to an awful lot of effort to reach me. Talked to his dad, who went to Maxie, who contacted me… You have lots of people who worry about you, ya know. It ain't fair to be troubling them."

"I didn't mean to trouble anyone," I began quickly, too fast to sound innocuous, and then I frowned. "How'd you find me?"

"You're the one who said I'd know. Of course, I went to the Seafloor Cavern first…" Archie laughed with a hand on his chest. "It's been years, and you're still dealing with Kyogre now? You have to learn to let things go."

I turned, my mastered smile forced on my lips. "I have. I just come here sometimes because… it's beautiful. And the cave is so quiet—it's such a nice place to think."

"I'll tell you, scamp, there are a lot of beautiful and quiet places out there in the world. Don't you go treating me like an idiot—I see right through you." His voice went firm, as it seldom did, and I looked away from him. "No matter how many times you go back in there, that beastie's not going to show up again."

"I'm not expecting it to," I countered sharply, and then I shook my head. "I'm sorry. I spoke out of turn."

Archie snorted, and when I met his gaze again, he grinned. "Are you fifty-years-old? 'Spoke out of turn?'"

Well, I'd say that Archie wasn't one to make apologies, but he _had_ apologized to me for what happened. He knew the time and the place for it—and he meant them, too. Which wasn't to say I didn't mean my apology, I just…

I tried again. "I'm not expecting Kyogre to show back up in there. It's sitting in my PC—I would know, I check almost every day…"

"You have the legendary Pokémon Kyogre encoded in data?" Archie's right eyebrow rose, slipping underneath his bandana, and then he burst out in laughter. "You'd have all of the power in the world if you used it. And still you're insanely strong without it… I should've asked you at the start of all of this to join Team Aqua."

"Don't be ridiculous," I snapped, and Archie waggled a finger at me.

"There she is! My little scamp! So she's still in there, eh?" I smacked away his hand as he got closer to me, but that only made him more pleased. "I'll tell ya, I only ever saw you when you were playing hero, but the second you stepped into that cave, I realized that everyone just sent a little girl in there to cover our asses and fix my mistakes."

_Perfect! You're just as great as any little hero saving the world oughta be!_

I whimpered, turning away again so he wouldn't see my trembling lip. "I did what I had to do."

Why was I making excuses for myself? I did more than I had to do, didn't I? Anyone else would have backed out, left it up to the adults to solve the problem like they ought to do. So why couldn't I just admit that aloud? Why couldn't I nod and tell everyone how terrified being thrown into that very cave by myself made me?

"It's embarrassing to admit for all of the adults involved back then—none of us had the power you did. If someone else picked up the Red Orb that day, the world might have been lost," Archie continued, sounding so serious for once that I almost forgot who he was. "Maybe you were the only hope we had."

The only hope?

I felt my heart begin to go off again. "I guess so," I said quickly. "I have to go."

"Hold on there a second, scamp." Archie's hand landed on my shoulder, and I yanked myself away from him. "I think I have a pretty good idea why you told Pretty Boy my name, but I want to hear it from you—why did you tell him I'd know where you go on Sundays?"

"Stop," I warned him, before I went off on him.

The only reason I told Steven to ask Archie about where I went was because I thought the Team Aqua boss understood—he knew that I got scared in the cave, after all. He always treated me like I was beneath him, and everyone else always treated me as an equal. So, if anyone would get why I went to the Cave of Origin, it'd be him.

"Come on," Archie encouraged.

"The whole thing was your fault," I barked, turning back to face Archie with damp cheeks. When did I start crying? "But when I was in there, you were the one who realized that I was scared. No one else had any idea. They still don't."

Archie crossed his arms, folding them right on top of his pendant—complete again with his Key Stone, which he probably got back years ago. Of course, I never returned his Sharpedonite. I would have to now, wouldn't I?

"Can you go back in?"

I shrugged, wiping my cheeks dry. "Yeah, obviously. I just came from there."

He shook his head, jabbing a thumb towards the doors. "Aye, lass, but I mean right now."

"The attendants are coming soon," I explained, but it wasn't really an explanation at all. Technically, I could go into the Cave of Origin whenever I wanted now. The attendants knew me and knew my importance, and Wallace never said I couldn't. I just didn't like people knowing that I went into the cave all the time.

"Perfect. Then they'll know you'll be in there, so if you run into any trouble, they'll fetch Pretty Boy Number Two." Number Two? Wallace probably. "Listen, you're gonna go grab that fish from your PC, and you're gonna face it again."

I shook my head, an adamant rejection of his plan—if one could even call it that. "I can't."

"You ever tell Pretty Boy you couldn't?" When I averted my gaze, Archie chuckled. "Well, that's your first issue. You never said you couldn't, so no one said not to. And because of that, you now have to deal with the consequences."

"Don't try to sound intelligent. It doesn't suit you."

Archie winked and wagged a finger at me again. "Aye, I like when you're feisty the most. Reminds me of Shelly."

"Please don't compare me to her." I rubbed my temple—at least my heart slowed back down again, even if I now had a headache. "All right. What do you propose I do once I get Kyogre out of my PC? Let it go? Because I don't trust the world enough to not repeat the same mistakes again. That was Zinnia's whole point, and while she might not have gone about things the right way, she was right."

"Nah, nah, I'm not an idiot." Archie smiled wide, which made me think his argument invalid. "You're gonna wrestle it."

* * *

><p>I couldn't take Archie seriously when he put it like that, and who could? But it was enough to get a smile out of me, which had been his goal in saying it. One-half of it, anyway. The other goal was to get me to say yes, and… well, it worked.<p>

Here I was, back in the Cave of Origin wearing the Aqua Suit I hadn't worn in years—at least it had been too big on me to start—and holding an Ultra Ball with my greatest fear in the palm of my hand. In this suit, I began to sweat, but maybe it was the sheer concern for my own safety that made that happen.

"Testing, testing. You hear me, scamp?"

I stopped, leaning against a wall and sliding down to the floor. This was all too familiar—not just a nightmare anymore but something real.

"Scamp? Hello? You all right in there?"

I unlatched the helmet and pulled it off my head, gasping for air despite having plenty of oxygen in there. I couldn't do it. I couldn't go back in here wearing that suit and see Kyogre again. The nightmare ended when I woke up—at least it usually did. So if I went into this while I was awake, well… I didn't know if my body could take it.

Archie had a point, though. I needed to face this.

Inhaling deeply, I pulled the helmet back on and latched it into place. I could hear Archie's voice again the second it clicked into place, still calling my name a minute after I disconnected.

"Scamp? Scamp?"

"Sorry, Archie. I'm here," I said in my clearest, most controlled voice. He knew that was a farce, but whatever.

"Oh… Good. I'm amazed this damn piece of equipment still works after all these years. Hell, I'm amazed that I could remember how to speak to you from here. But I digress." He laughed, but the sound sent shivers up my spine rather than his alternative goal. "You know the plan, scamp? You scared?"

I didn't respond, but he could probably hear it from my broken breathing.

"How far are you from where you need to be?"

I knew this cave inside and out now. The walk to the dwelling wasn't exactly far, and the haze meant to confuse any visitors here no longer did its job. I could usually make it in or out of the cave in ten minutes, assuming I didn't need to stop along the way—which I already did.

"Few minutes." I paused, curling my now-bulky fingers into my fist. "Will you talk to me?"

"I _am_ talking to you."

"Ha, ha." I glanced at the Ultra Ball in my hand and sighed. "Archie, back at your base, when Zinnia attacked you… you gave me your Sharpedonite and told me to take your power. Why'd you give it to me?"

"Because you looked scared again. I thought you might need help, and since Zinnia already defeated me once, I knew any help I could give beyond that would be pointless. But don't go getting all sentimental on me, scamp," he added hastily. "When it all comes down to it, all of the help anyone ever gave you was all they could do. Don't forget that."

I didn't say anything else. I wanted him to keep talking to me, to keep me moving, but I didn't know what I could say. Even what I did—helping that man in the Petalburg Woods, trying to stop Team Aqua from reviving Kyogre, going into the Cave of Origin. I did all of that because I had to do it, because no one else did.

Had Steven offered me as much help as he could? All right, sure. But what about my dad? Had he even attempted to help? And the other Gym Leaders, save for maybe Wallace? The Elite Four? None of them did anything to help me, and they were the strongest in Hoenn behind Steven.

"I still have your Mega Stone. I'll give it back when I get out of here," I promised. Assuming I made it out alive a second time.

The basin came into view just ahead of me, and I ran—as quickly as I could in this suit but knowing it probably looked like an awkward waddle—to the ledge. It was always as I stood on the edge that I remembered everything everyone once told me.

That I had to do this. That I could. That I was the hero.

I took the Ultra Ball and clicked it open with a shaking finger, closing my eyes as the ancient beast erupted from it into the seawater in front of me.

When it roared, I cried out and sunk to my knees, unable to stand the sheer sight of it.

"Scamp!"

All of those memories that I relived every night in my sleep—they weren't just fragments of a nightmare like I convinced myself. Those things truly happened, and everything I feared was back again before me. If Kyogre wished it, and who knew if it could, I would be dead.

"A-Archie." I let my fingers curl into my palms against the floor, the rock beneath me probably scratching the fabric of the suit. "What do I do?"

"Jump on the beastie's back, scamp. Use the primal reversion again and jump on its back." His voice in my ear wasn't so reassuring this time, and I couldn't fight back the tears that threatened to spill. "Let it show you that it doesn't want to hurt you."

I moved my hand to my bag, my trembling fingers finding their way around the Blue Orb in my bag—kept in the safest pocket I had, the one I never dared enter anymore. But I couldn't bring myself to take it out and release the horrible power I knew it contained. Seeing the monster before me, though calm now, just floating in the small pool with its gaze resting on me, brought all of those nightmares to life.

"I can't."

"It doesn't want to hurt you," Archie repeated. "Not like before. You captured it—you have the Red Orb. Jump on Kyogre's back, May."

I sobbed as I lifted the Blue Orb from my bag and held it above my head. The cave was engulfed in a warm, blue light, the epicenter between my fingers. And when that light hit Kyogre, it was like an explosion—I covered my face with my hands, despite having the helmet, as a burst of energy came towards me.

And the second that explosion settled like glittering dust around me and the light from the Blue Orb faded, Kyogre rested peacefully in the water as if nothing changed—still staring at me, still waiting for me to make my move.

With some effort, I managed to get to my feet and stand in front of Kyogre. And then I ran.

When I landed on Kyogre's back for the second time in my life, I gripped its dorsal fins and slid myself onto the middle of its back. It roared, and the sound made me flinch—but I didn't let go, not even when it dipped beneath the water's surface.

"A—you—be—"

"Archie, you're breaking—!"

The static erupted before I managed to get my whole sentence out, and I held my breath until it cut out completely.

I was alone… underwater with the primal Kyogre I once fought… back in a place I never thought I would see again.

Not that I ever truly saw it in the first place. As I glanced around me, being pulled slowly along this time, I realized I never saw any of this before—and it was kind of peaceful down in the deep. The endless blue, the light from the glowing stones in the distance… it was all kind of beautiful.

"Can we go back up?" I asked the blue beast, and its roar echoed this time in the water—like a song more than a violent cry.

We broke surface but a minute later, and it swam right up against the ledge instead of throwing me off this time. I stumbled up, and then I lay back against the ground, my face pointed up towards the stalactites above me.

"Archie?"

There was some static, and then, between it, came his voice, "You okay, scamp?"

The tears slid down the sides of my face towards my ears, and then I sobbed louder and louder until I couldn't hear anything else anymore. Archie's voice kept saying something, but I couldn't understand a word.

These tears were a start. They weren't confining like my other tears—not like at night or when I came here on other Sundays. I almost felt… free.

"I'm going to get Pretty Boy Number Two," I finally managed to hear clearly from Archie, and I sniffled.

"No, no." I sniffled once more and exhaled slowly. "I'm coming out now. I'm okay."

"Well, tell me that before you start crying next time!" Archie grumbled, and I smiled, laughing quietly between another couple of lingering sobs.

I sat up and reached for the Ultra Ball to call Kyogre back. It blinked at me before disappearing back into the safety of its data enclosure, and I held it gingerly in my hands. It still scared me—I couldn't deny that, and six years of fear couldn't be erased in the few minutes I swam with it. But… I could live knowing it was there.

I always had, hadn't I?

With a grunt, I stood up and said my temporary goodbye to Archie as I unlatched the helmet. The fresh Sootopolian air would never taste better.

And I hurried out of the Cave of Origin just as I always did, knowing that maybe I'd be back next Sunday—probably. I needed time. More time than this.

Maybe it was okay to ask for help…

When I pushed the doors open, I didn't give myself time to adjust to the sun. I ran forward, squinting at the figure standing near the bridge and tossing the helmet aside, and threw my arms around him. His arms got caught beneath mine, and he awkwardly patted my elbow because that was all he could reach. It probably would have been just as awkward even if his hands were free.

"Not all of your ideas are good. In fact, a lot of them are pretty damn stupid," I told Archie, dropping my arms and taking a step back. "And wrestling Kyogre would be… It would be stupid. Yeah. But facing it again? That was a pretty good idea."

With a smile, Archie reached a hand up to my head, and he patted it just like he did back at his base. "Are you holding up okay, scamp?"

I nodded. "I'll be fine," I assured him, smiling as he ruffled my hair this time. "I'll get better."

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> My first ORAS piece, and it has to be an angsty one. You expect anything less from me at this point? (The next one'll be fluffy, I promise.)

One of the things I really liked about ORAS is the development of the characters' relationships with each other. Archie, despite finding May (or Brendan) a nuisance, likes her—or, at the very least, finds her amusing. I also think he was one of the only characters to talk to her like the kid she is (in spite of everyone referring to the protagonist as a child, mostly everyone talks as if speaking with another adult), especially in that one part where he says, "Don't be afraid, scamp! You leap right onto that beastie's back!"

So, it was important to me in this fic that May _hate_ the things forced upon her because of Archie's poor choices but _like_ the man who caused them, kind of like a dad (a better one than Norman, probs). He's the first one she lets see her scared.

Also, I had to make him say to wrestle Kyogre in at least one fic. I'm a loser.


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